10:29 AMSarah: christ, i'm hungry
me: I just ate a whole grapefruit at my desk and it feels like it just made a grapefruit-sized hole.
Sarah: i had granola for breakfast which is really only useful for like an hour
me: Totally. That shit is like rocket fuel for my metabolism. I need to eat a planet one hour later.
10:34 AM Sarah: also did not help that i spent like an hour looking at cheese on the internet last night
me: I have been digging for food videos all day, so also guilty.
10:35 AM Sarah: after i ordered i was like "oh NO. i could have gotten a LOAF OF CHEDDAR"
10:36 AM Sarah:
mark my words, if i ever get paid more than $500 for a piece of
writing, the first thing i am doing is ordering a loaf of cheese
10:37 AM me: <3
10:38 AM Sarah: i mean look at it https://www. wisconsincheesemart.com/item/ cheddar-12-year-half-loaf-Kpr/
me: 12 years???
I want it!
Sarah: it's basically the pappy van winkle of cheddar cheeses
10:40 AM me: This website is making me feel feelings.
10:41 AM They smoke string cheese??? You come from a magical place.
Sarah: i am also having regrets about not ordering that. smoked string cheese is radical
i gave myself a budget
haha
10:42 AM me: This website's existence has just increased the amount of cheese I'm having mailed to me by 100%.
10:43 AM Let me ask you a serious question: is growing up in Wisconsin as saturated by cheese curds as I imagine it to be?
10:44 AM Because no one has ever heard of a cheese curd in New Mexico, and I only got them when we went to our lake house in upstate NY.
Sarah: i have no idea what anyone else's life was like, but i ate cheese curds, colby slices, and baby swiss at dinner every night
and if you are in my mom's house for more than five minutes there's a plate of cheese and sausage out.
me: YOU COME FROM A MAGICAL PLACE.
Sarah: i didn't know they DIDN'T exist elsewhere until i moved
and was like "OH"
10:45 AM same with kringle, which barely even exists outside of one region of the state
me:
When we got to Ticonderoga, the first thing my mom and I would do was
go to the grocery store and buy every bag of cheese curds we could find.
Sometimes they didn't have them and I would be like, "SUMMER VACATION IS
RUINED."
Until you said the word "kringle" to me, I'd never even considered it.
10:46 AM Sarah: we only really do a few things that are special but we do them very well
10:47 AM me:
Probably if anyone else has a birthday where they force people to bring
them goodies from their home state, they should make friends with
someone from Lake Geneva.
You're going to have to be friends with so many people!
10:49 AM Sarah: hahah
me: Wait, why haven't I ever eaten Juustoleipa?
10:50 AM Sarah: i never have either actually
10:51 AM me:
When we make $500, we should probably fix that. Any kind of cheese that
asks you to make it hot and melty before you eat it is my kind of
cheese.
Sarah: correct
now i have cheese ordering remorse
10:52 AM me:
Don't worry. I'm going to birthday treat myself to a bunch of fucking
cheese and you are invited. Like, after we recover from Saturday.
Sarah:
also if you want to hide all of the cheese you get on friday and have
me try to find some of the stuff they occasionally import at murrays, i
wont tell a soul
10:53 AM mostly because i would really like to see you eat three pounds of cheese curds.
me: No, stop it. You've just given me the key to the Wisconsin cheese Pandora's Box. I can't start hoarding yet.
I mean... we've met, right?
Sarah: exactly
10:54 AM i feel like i have to abandon lunch of vegetables now and eat a cheese sandwich immediately
me: YEAH!
(I am eating leftover baked ziti for lunch, which is the only reason I'm not panicking.)
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